Dark Knight, Mid-Day

178.9 - 6.7 miles. Rode over to Ragle Park and did the fun loop of single-track back there. See if this html works:


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Caught the newest Batman installment in a matinee. Why don't I walk the block and a half to the theatre more often to see movies as they are intended to be seen? (Mostly because whenever I think to go see a movie, I find the next start time is more than 90 minutes away and my gnat-sized attention span takes me elsewhere before showtime.)

I guess I'm a sucker for hype; this movie has gotten a lot. That tends to mean one of:

• it's a great movie, or


• the producers are desperate to get butts in seats

I think the first, but jeeze, what hath Bob Kane wrought? While the caped crusader was never a particularly happy-go-lucky kinda guy, I hardly think, in the original 1930s late-night inkfests when he was created, that anything this dark and complex ever crossed anyone's mind.

OK, the big hype was around Heath Ledger, playing the Joker in his last role. Well, what actor in his right mind follows Nicholson? I have to say the actor's craft is somewhat oblique to me. To me, a good actor is one in whom you don't notice "acting," and beyond that, it's really hard for me to say, of a characterization I enjoy, how much was good acting and how much was good writing/ direction/ production/ costumery/ popcorn/ mood-on-my-part, but this Joker was really pretty damn captivating, without the scenery-mastication that tends to typify the role, and it was definitely—-definitely--an entirely different person from the Brokeback Mountain character. (Actually, I don't recall being that impressed with Nicholson's Joker, which, after all, was mostly just a painted Nicholson... I'll have to see that one again now.) Based on that, I think the hype around Ledger here was well-justified.

Why does Maggie Gyllenhaal give me the creeps?

Christian Bale has turned out to be perhaps the best Batman yet. This is a seriously twisted person, almost as much in his way (as an endless line of critics have noted) as the Joker himself. But then, what sane actor would NOT follow Adam West?

Modern America doesn't have a lot of mythology going for it, so characters like Batman (when not played in camp form) provide an interesting glimpse into the collective psyche. When we can invent a persona and a physical presence, what do we choose? Among others, a millionaire vigilante with a chip on his shoulder the size of Utah. Hey, that almost sounds like... George W. Bush! (W. plays it a little more campy, though.)

As for the rest, I like how the accoutrements were mostly underplayed. Sure, he has the newest-model Batmobile, hang-glider cape, etc., but for the most part, that stuff is incidental to the story.

The typical Batman scenery is full-on Art Deco, as if Gotham were inhabited almost entirely by unhinged wealthy gay collectors. That, too, seems muted here--though the backgrounds are so dark it's hard to tell--when you see a wide shot of the city, it's early 21st century all the way.

I was forewarned that this movie was unrelentingly dark, with almost no humor. Actually, there were several places where the entire audience laughed (and one where only I did--FYI, that was where the judge's destination was revealed to her).

OK, seriously, I have a hard time thinking of stuff to write about movies. This is a long, dark, beautiful movie; it's worth seeing in a theatre. I give it all five stars.

Superstars of Permaculture

I had a permaculture-intensive weekend. Saturday, we took a tour of water savvy stars of Sebastopol, including Catchtail Farm on the Blucher Creek watershed, a talk with Brock Dolman on (and in) the Laguna de Santa Rosa, and a visit to the Post-Carbon Institute.

Sunday, I went to an open house at the Regenerative Design Institute in Bolinas.

I have a huge mish-mash of thoughts and inspirations around this, so please excuse a scattered posting. I'll try to fix it later.

What I've seen this weekend, and really in about the past year, is that, beyond the facts of global warming and peak oil, people are beginning to see that we are really on or past peak EVERYthing, and the Republicans aren't the only party that is pretty much over. It's really rather amazing that the US culture of excess has lasted as long as it has. However, it's also evident that there will still be parties.

Here's the thing: EVEN IF NONE OF THIS WAS HAPPENING, the following would be good things to do:
. Build community
. Grow food
. Learn all you can about conservation of all kinds
. Practice conservation
. Become more efficient

These are good things to do; if the left-wing liberal screwballs and Al Gore are correct in their dire predictions, these things may also become necessary.

In a time of massive inflation, good will and food become more valuable currency than paper money.

It doesn't matter if you own or rent the place where you live, you are still the custodian of it, and you can still create what you want (and need) in that space.

The Catchtail Farm folks have a really lovely place and a great outlook, and they're the kind of community members I hope I can become. When they started at this location, they built a fire circle in their yard and invited everyone up and down the street to a party at their house (see? already! Still having parties!). They've done smart things with their land, but what sticks with me--and what I believe will carry them through any coming crisis--is that they have built--are building--a strong community.

Brock gave a great walk and talk on water, and more to the point, on watersheds, at the Laguna. He's a man who likes to play with words, so I enjoyed his talk.

The Post-Carbon (heh, I first typo'd "Post-Carob") Institute is doing amazing stuff in a town environment in Sebastopol. Besides maintaining a large "victory garden," they're setting up an electric- and hybrid-car rental service for our town.

Something Terrie noted, and that surfaced on one of my quote pages in my daily catch-up work there, that has stuck with me too: "When it comes to getting things done, we need fewer architects and more bricklayers." -Colleen C. Barrett (insert here a hundred other sayings about the relative worth of action vs. thought.)

There are a lot of people who are full of blue-sky ideas. Ideas are great. Ideas make the world go 'round. One person who can and will carry a rock 30 yards is worth approximately 15 people with ideas about how to move a rock 30 yards. Does anybody want to carry the rock? I'm here to suggest that the best architects have lain bricks, nailed boards, framed walls, hung sheet rock, and maybe even that only those people have really proven themselves qualified to BE architects... (More later)

Rode

172.2: 17.8 miles.

I've gotten in a few rides this week, dinging the odometer in miniscule chunks, but managed about 16 miles Wednesday and then this ride today, to Santa Rosa and back. Feels good. I'm slower than just about everything else out there, but I pushed it today and kept it up near 13 mph most of the time, and that in a headwind. More and more, I'm just on the big ring in front and the highest few gears in back. A roadier bike would have a better gear ratio and would be more efficient and therefore faster and that's a large percentage of the people who are going faster than me.

Cary Grant jag fading. The Awful Truth (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0028597/) was hilarious, great fun. Indiscreet (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0051773/) was a little slow, but it isn't a comedy and romance isn't really my bag. My Favorite Wife (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0029284/), good, but not up there with The Awful Truth...

Heroes

Another kid from Santa Rosa is coming home from the middle east in a box.

People call him a hero. Something bothers me about that. It makes me wince a little. Maybe it's the fact that they don't know anything about him, and tend to use that word "hero" in the same breath with words like "freedom" and "fighting terrorism," words our resident (I still have trouble including a "p" on the front of that word) has used over and over in a sanctimonious way to try to cover his lies about the war. In fact, whenever I hear that word "freedom" nowadays, I hear it spoken in W's simpering voice, and it becomes a simplistic, one-dimensional concept that has been drained of all of its original meaning. "Terrorism? That's people not like us." I think it has come to be mostly a synonym for "Islam."

Because in fact they are fighting a lot of things over there, but it doesn't seem like they're fighting terrorism, particularly, and I just don't see how they are defending freedom, by ANY stretch of the imagination.

Maybe it's the people I've known in my life who have chosen to go into the armed forces and police. Some of them really believe they are doing something noble, becoming peace-keepers and/or defending the concept of freedom. Others, well, they were bullies before and they remained bullies, in uniforms. They wanted to shoot guns and blow shit up, and maybe they even wanted to kill people. In regular society, that's not a hero. Somehow, you put a uniform on it and it's all cleaned-up and noble.

Or, they wanted a free education, someone to tell them what to do, some kind of structure in their lives, and really could be considered unwitting heroes when they found themselves one day sitting in a Hummer that happened to roll over an IED.

Heroism is more about the cause than the effect, isn't it? It's about your motives.

How much does an 18- to 22-year-old kid really understand about what it means to join the military and fight an old men's war? What do they really know about the principles on which this country was founded, that they are allegedly defending all those thousands of miles away?

But in a culture whose favorite pastimes include a game called "Guitar Hero," I guess I understand why people call these kids heroes.

I don't think you can automatically call a guy a hero just because he gets himself killed overseas. I think they deserve to get the benefit of the doubt to some extent--maybe this latest casualty WAS a hero--but I wouldn't automatically put them on a pedestal. And in any case, I wouldn't inflict the final indignity of putting Bush's vapid words in their mouths.

If one of these children had an uncommon understanding of world politics (or at least, say, a Harvard Business School edumacation), and no immediate financial need (oh, perhaps, was from a cushy Texas political family backed by Big Oil), and STILL left a promising future and gallons of alcohol and piles of cocaine, signed up and went overseas as a Private First Class...? Maybe THAT kid would be a hero.

Chill on the Anti-Warming

There seems to be a number of people (and I think that number is three, and they all post regularly [one might say obsessively] on the comment boards of the Santa Rosa Press-Democrat {pressdemo.com}) who are still and/or newly in denial about the global warming question.

They tend to cite one book--I've never seen anyone cite two--and tend to set it up against Gore's movie "An Inconvenient Truth."

They also tend to posit that the entire GW "thing" is a conspiracy by "libs" to "keep us from consuming," "prevent us from enjoying life," etc.

I admire these people for their ability to hold an idea against the overwhelming tide of scientific facts and opinion, but I have a few questions.

Is there more than one book that debunks this GW "thing"?

IF the whole thing is untrue, an evil plot by liberals, even if the world is COOLING, how does it follow that there is any wisdom in continuing to spew crap into the earth, air, and water of this planet? Conversely, Mr. Conservative, what would it hurt if we attempted to Conserve a little?

In other words, whether it's true or not, wouldn't it be better to act as if it were true than to act as if it weren't?

I'm just asking.

Citizen Manners

What is it that makes people think they are exempt from rules, laws, and ETHICS to which the rest of us are subject?

Why, at the park around the corner, with signs clearly posted at every entrance forbidding off-leash dogs, and with a dog park less than two miles away where dogs can run and play untethered with other dogs, does almost everyone but me walk their dog without a leash? This is a place I love and respect. It is not really a man-made park along the lines of a city park, so much as a careful intrusion into a sensitive wetland habitat, a place where humans are allowed to observe from the edge, if they're considerate and careful. I try to keep my silence while I walk Laika there, passing dog after loose unruly dog and owner after lazy, apathetic owner. I'm not the police here, not even a hall monitor set to rat on offenders, the better to smooch on the derriere of the nearest elected or appointed uniform. I don't even necessarily believe in blindly following all laws to the letter. But these regulations make SENSE here, especially in cumulative form. Maybe it would be okay if one person's dog ran free while they walked, in reasonable voice control. But one leads to ten leads to a hundred, and there's shit all over the trails, and loose animals that threaten my dog and who knows what wildlife creatures here.

I called a guy on it in the parking lot. His dog came directly up to us and completely ignored him while he called it. I pointed out the sign, thirty feet from his car, and tried to make it light, but the frustration of repeated offense boiled up a little, especially when HE got all pissed off at ME for calling him on it, and then when it was down to the F bomb with him after only three lines of dialog.

What is WRONG with people?

I guess one very basic point from Sunday morning's post is: don't push your political views at the workplace? That's just childish, and it invites strife where cooperation is required. I would say the same about religion, following a very common rule of etiquette that suggests avoiding both of these topics at the dinner table.

And I did once have a co-worker who drove a Hummer. Luckily I never had to work with him directly--I don't think I could've kept a straight face. So... if you want to be respected and taken seriously, don't drive your Hummer (Escalade, Yukon, Navigator, Land Rover, Excursion...) to work either.

There's much more to say. Stay tuned.

Music and Endorphins

I just finished reading a book “This is Your Brain On Music” (http://tinyurl.com/3fndff) which advanced that as well as other facts and theories. I absolutely believe music causes your brain to produce endorphins, and I had never put those words to it until reading this book! I should find that section and copy it out.

I made a “smart playlist” in my itunes where I just went through all the songs (26000+ now) marking the ones I like to sing along with. This created a playlist of some 3200 all-time fave songs. We listened to it on the trip to Death Valley and back—only got through about 350!—but maybe partly from the power of suggestion from reading that, it was incredible how GOOD I felt, with song after song producing waves of euphoria, just the simple happiness of hearing familiar notes (after all, what makes us like a piece of music other than familiarity? When you like “new” music, it’s usually not far from your “old” music, right? You take little steps, not huge leaps, into new genres and styles. And some people never leave the 12” circle of songs they grooved to in High School, and Kansas “Dust in the Wind” just keeps giving ‘em shivers till they keel over at 50.) MANY songs literally bring tears to my eyes—actually, I think I have overactive tear ducts, but still. It’s just a HUGE wave of STRONG emotion, the proverbial ton of bricks. And often, kinda interestingly, it was the odd segue, where one song stops and an entirely OTHER, unexpectedly-different-but-still-smack-you-in-the-face familiar, song starts. I got that again and again, that happy surprise.

I’m still listening to that playlist almost two months later, at the computer now and again—here’s 803 – 809:

Grateful Dead “Tennessee Jed” (hey, it’s MY list),
Eurythmics “Sweet Dreams,”
the Supremes “Come See About Me,”
Lambert Hendricks and Ross “Twisted,”
the Kinks “Dandy,”
Fats Domino “Ain’t That A Shame,”
Talking Heads “Paper” …

and that isn’t even a particularly good stretch, as stretches go in this list, but still, that jolt of recognition when Fats fades out and those first jangly chords of “Paper” kick in! It’s fuckin’ amazing! I guess I’ve always gotten this from music I like, but having it laid out like this is like eating dessert first and dessert only, on and on, without ever getting sick.

I tried to make this smart playlist sorta random, by sorting by track number. Thus all the songs that are the first tracks on their CDs play first (an interesting side effect--the secondary sort is by album title, so a box set or, say, Led Zeppelin [whose first four albums were of course alphabetically similar], or the Who [many of whose albums start with the word "Who"], and note the "American" jag! may get a string of songs in a row).

For fans of lists, here are the first 100 songs (includes track numbers).

My Doorbell White Stripes
No Class Motorhead
Love Is a Stranger Eurythmics
Come Together Beatles 1
After The Fox Hollies 1 of 24
Tell Me Why Neil Young 1 of 11
Black Cow Steely Dan 1 of 7
I Wish That I Could Be You Muffs 1 of 13
Let Me! Paul Revere & the Raiders 1 of 15
I Get Around Beach Boys 1 of 12
Do You Believe In Magic Lovin' Spoonful 1 of 14
Radiates That Charm Downbeats 1
I Don't Like You Muffs 1 of 24
Box Of Rain Grateful Dead 1 of 10
American Idiot Green Day 1 of 13
American Pie Don McLean 1 of 12
American Woman Guess Who 1
Sherry Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons 1 of 26
St. Stephen Grateful Dead 1 of 12
Dig My Grave They Might Be Giants 1 of 38
Welcome To The Jungle Guns N' Roses 1 of 12
Aqualung Jethro Tull 1 of 17
Hold Your Head Up Argent 1 of 8
Victoria Kinks 1 of 22
Superstition Stevie Wonder 1 of 17
Sir Duke Stevie Wonder 1 of 16
More Than This Roxy Music 1 of 10
It's Gonna Be Alright Gerry & the Pacemakers 1 of 10
To Know Him Is To Love Him Teddy Bears 1 of 23
You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin' Righteous Brothers 1 of 18
Who Knows Jimi Hendrix 1 of 6
Shoot Out The Lights X 1 of 16
No Reply Beatles 1 of 14
Our Lips Are Sealed Go-Gos 1 of 11
Time Passages Al Stewart 1
Rag Mop Ames Brothers 1 of 16
Come And Get It Badfinger 1
Angry Eyes Loggins & Messina 1 of 10
California Dreamin' Mamas & Papas 1 of 11
Never In My Life Mountain 1 of 12
You Send Me Sam Cooke 1 of 13
Cocktails For Two Spike Jones 1 of 12
Little Willy Sweet 1 of 16
House Of The Rising Sun Animals 1 of 15
I Fought The Law Bobby Fuller Four 1 of 14
The Rain, The Park, And Other Things Cowsills 1 of 14
China Grove Doobie Brothers 1 of 11
Be My Baby Ronettes 1 of 18
Love Is A Battlefield Pat Benatar 1 of 15
Train 4 Non Blondes 1
Dancing With Myself Billy Idol 1 of 16
Enter Sandman Metallica 1 of 12
Respectable Street XTC 1 of 14
Brown Eyed Girl Van Morrison 1 of 13
Blue Sky Mine Midnight Oil 1 of 10
Somewhere (From West Side Story) Tom Waits 1 of 10
Bo Diddley Bo Diddley 1 of 24
More Than A Feeling Boston 1
Any Road George Harrison 1
Home Iggy Pop 1 of 14
Day of the Eagle Robin Trower 1 of 13
Bridge Over Troubled Water Simon & Garfunkel 1 of 11
Hung Upside Down Buffalo Springfield 1 of 20
Baby Now That I've Found You Foundations 1 of 10
Timothy Buoys 1
By The Way Red Hot Chili Peppers 1 of 16
Around The World Red Hot Chili Peppers 1 of 15
Do It Again Steely Dan 1 of 16
Give It To the Soft Boys Soft Boys 1 of 17
No Time Guess Who 1 of 11
Just What I Needed Cars 1 of 13
Space Oddity David Bowie 1 of 18
25 O'Clock Dukes Of Stratosphear 1 of 16
Sin's A Good Man's Brother Grand Funk Railroad 1 of 12
Ol' 55 Tom Waits 1 of 12
I Hear You Knockin' Dave Edmunds 1 of 18
Come On Down To My Boat Every Mother's Son 1 of 14
Making Time Creation 1 of 20
Bodhisattva Steely Dan 1 of 8
School Supertramp 1 of 8
Suite: Judy Blue Eyes Crosby, Stills, & Nash 1 of 10
Freedom Jimi Hendrix 1 of 10
Speak To Me/Breathe Pink Floyd 1 of 9
You're Pretty Good Looking (For A Girl) White Stripes 1 of 13
My Big Mouth Posies 1 of 10
Dear Eloise Hollies 1 of 15
Dedicated To The One I Love Shirelles 1 of 15
Carry On Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young 1 of 10
Hurricane Bob Dylan 1 of 9
The Pied Piper Crispian St. Peters 1 of 15
Everyone's Gone To The Moon (Mono) Jonathan King 1 of 14
Manic Monday Bangles 1 of 12
Down To The Waterline Dire Straits 1 of 9
Elephant Talk King Crimson 1 of 8
Where Have All the Good Times Gone? Van Halen 1 of 12
Dixie Chicken Little Feat 1 of 10
So It Goes Nick Lowe 1 of 19
Ever Fallen In Love? Buzzcocks 1 of 19
The Modern World Jam 1 of 19
Daniel Elton John 1 of 14

It leans pretty heavily to the 60s, and having arranged and listened to my iPod by year, I've come to believe that the mid- to late-60s really were an incredibly fruitful time in the short history of pop music. (AND ALL THAT STUFF WAS ON AM RADIO, and I got a transistor radio for christmas when I was like 10--yeah, 1967.)

Anyone out there? Want more of the list? mlevel at gmail dot com.

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I have a co-worker who has been kind of an enigma. He is very busy and often inaccessible, so the few personal exchanges I have had with him have been in the nature of interruptions of work. I know he was in the military in Desert Storm I and his work was "blowing things up." He is very knowledgeable about our company's product, which runs on the Web and often requires significant customization. He knew of the song "Turning Japanese" but didn't know the artist, which might or might not indicate a certain depth of musical knowledge. I know he was in the market for, and eventually bought, a Les Paul guitar.

I know he is a Christian because of the many subtle and not-so-subtle signals... One was that for a while his IM avatar was a cartoon Jesus with electric guitar, underlined "Jesus Rocks." I've seen him give a CD that had the earmarks of "religious pop" to another person I know to be "fundamentally" religious...

I know his brother died recently, and he has not cut his hair since then.

This, really, is pretty much the sum total of what I know about him.

Except last week, his IM avatar changed to show, on the left, a picture of McCain with the word "Capitalism" under it, and on the right, Obama, captioned "Socialism."

A bit of an aside here: I have had this problem ever since George W. Bush became president of the United States. If I learn that someone voted for Bush in 2000--worse, in 2004--I can no longer respect that person's intelligence, and usually can no longer even LIKE them. The one exception is a millionaire, whom I know actually stands to benefit from the Bush presidency. Before Bush, politics was not unlike sports to me, where some people stood with one team and others stood with another. It just wasn't that defining, to say you liked the Redskins vs. the Giants. They were all pretty much the same, other than a thin veneer of this or that bent. Sure, people got passionate about a candidate, rarely, but it mostly seemed to be pretty much hair-splitting. I could respect a person who voted republican, because there were legitimate reasons a person might do so, and while it wasn't MY way, it was within the realm of human possibility to want things to be the way republicans seem to want them. Now though, with the incontestible facts of the crimes of the Bush residency, and the daily evidence of the rank, cavaliere, smirking elitism-plus-stupidity of Bush himself, how could ANYone but a drooling moron back this guy and his minions (again with the exception of the only people he seems to notice--the top 2% extremely well-off)? It's like a $50k a year guy with a family of three buying a Hummer--I have to question their intelligence and, indeed, their SANITY. Besides being stupid, they're part of the problem.

And this co-worker has now planted a flag in that camp. I always suspected it of him, the military and christian clues pointing that way, but to have it come out in this way ... it makes me frustrated and sad, and I run all the rationalizing through my head and can't come to a logical conclusion for it. What kind of blinders make him not see hwo stupid and crazy that is?

The statement itself, painting the contest as Capitalism vs. Socialism, is so grossly and wrongly oversimplified as to be laughable. Capitalism is far less than what Bush and McCain stand for, and Socialism is far more than what Obama stands for. The funny thing is that I can see that in their mind, the person who creates and flashes this cartoon probably thinks that they're stating McCain's position exactly and maybe fudging Obama a little, to make their point. Both terms are extremely broad, and Bush/McCain *might* fit into the definition of Capitalism--if you ENTIRELY EXCLUDE Mom and Pop and the overwhelming majority of private citizens. Obama *might* fit into the definition of socialism--"property and the distribution of wealth are subject to control by the public [Wikipedia, sorry!]" if we understand that he would attempt to apply that control simply to level the playing field; that is, not continue to give the rich (and worse, the corporations) any breaks that the general public is not getting.

Bush/McCain (and I think it is entirely reasonable to use the "/" virgule here to mean "and," connecting the two at the hip) have demonstrated and will continue to demonstrate the kind of "Capitalism" wherein the Haliburtons (and how is a no-bid contract construed as Capitalism by any definition?) thrive and the lower and middle classes are left to languish. We've seen it in action for seven years now; it hasn't worked. These "people" (for they aren't really people, are they--they are "boards"), even more so than the legendarily inhuman 19th and 20th century robber barons, are intent on ruthlessly wringing every dollar they can out of the government and the populace with no regard for humanity and the future, and indeed I don't see how anyone can extrapolate a near future including anything but a smoking crater where the United States used to be, if they logically follow this trend--we're already halfway there!

I've been saying this for several years now: If you are unsure how to vote in the presidential election this year, it's really quite simple:

1. Add the value of your bank balance and personal assets today.

2. If it is less than 100 million US dollars, vote for Obama.

And THAT's just the economic side.

Watch this space; Road Rash Shall Return!

Oh, have you seen "Across the Universe" (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0445922/)? Are we the only ones to find it bad, bad, REALLY bad? I think there's an odd syndrome--I've seen it before, can't remember where--of 60s-and-Beatles-infatuation among people who were born post-60s-and-Beatles, and they seem to take ownership of the 60s and Beatles music in a way that is often extremely distasteful to me. Besides the codification of the 60s into convenient chewy clusters (one character drafted, another one black, a girl "too" involved in the anti-war protest movement , another in the club scene trying to sing like Janis Joplin...), in this movie, it appears they tried to build an entire plot around the 60s and most of the dialog out of (sung) Beatles songs. To me, as soon as you start naming characters "Jude," "Max(well)," "Prudence," "Sadie," "Lucy," you're already losin' me, kid. When half of those characters are ONLY there to support an occurrence of one person or another breaking into song (i.e. "Prudence's" whole raisin-bran d'etre in the ENTIRE movie was to have a scene where she's shut herself in a closet pouting and everyone outside the closet sings "Dear Prudence," now THAT's just stupid. They shoehorned songs into the plot, and plotlines into song-ops. The one English guy always sings with a smile on his face and everyone has these pure, clear (let's call it "plear") voices fresh out of "Fame" (they were born after THAT, too, I think). WAY too many telegraphed references to well-known Beatles and 60s trivia, like the use of apples and strawberries and the comment to Max about killing grandma with a hammer. There are a few cool animation bits (well, one, really), but ALL of that might not be too bad, but they ALSO had to bring my man Jimi into it! Now they're making me mad. The characters are zero-dimensional. The acting is out of Junior High, rising only occasionally to Sophomore level. The writing is just execrable. I had to watch it through because these are my heroes from, and this is the soundtrack of, my youth, and frankly I couldn't tear myself away, just like that reporter and the Hindenberg--"Oh the humanity!" .

2548.3 / 1354

Santa Rosa creek has trails following it on both sides. I decided to check these trails out today. Didn't expect to go over ten miles again, but ended up almost exactly 12, and precisely exhausted. Have I mentioned lately how much I hate a headwind? And how I always seem to have a ferocious one on the return trip? The trail is nice, though, mostly through dappled sunlight, going from vineyards and forest to neighborhood backyards, and then downtown Santa Rosa. I rode along the south side of the creek going out, and the north side back. Riders note: There are three streams that join the Creek on the north side, you have to ford them or else ride some (currently unknown) distance out of your way to get across. Not a big problem now and in the summer, but in the rainy season, you have every oppourtunity to get wet.

http://www.born-today.com/Vacations/2005/06/06-07.htm

2532.2 / 1344. Rode about twenty-two combined miles yesterday and today.

Yesterday, High School Rd -> Occidental -> Sandford Rd -> Hall -> Willowside, dirt road following Santa Rosa Creek. Almost exactly five miles each way, and not too hard for having not ridden since what, March? Carrying the binoculars (in the stretchy harness) proved impractical for any but the easiest rides - they were bumping my knees a good part of the time. Still it was nice to stop and get a good look at an adult Bald Eagle over the Laguna, which I probably wouldn't've been able to ID without the binos, and some other birds.

Today, Rodota trail out to Stony Point Rd. and back - about 12 miles. Pleasant enough, but for a bit of improper rubbing of my naughty bits in the bike shorts, which I eventually sorted out (why I am I writing like one of those prissy Brits? I don't know!). Lots of purple flowers out, along with the usual poppies etc. Really pretty, but I was traveling light today so no photos. Was forcibly reminded on the return how much I hate a headwind. Seemed like about 20mph, and was especially bad on the long straightaways where I could see a mile or more of trail ahead not getting noticeably shorter as I worked my ass off. It just drains my energy, and of course any momentum I might've managed, so I'm pedaling nonstop but just to keep moving, and every mile seems like three. I tried to stay in the highest gear I could manage, sometimes 3-6 but more often 3-5, each downshift a little defeat.

These are the first rides since I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. There is a little more urgency to my exercise now, since it's part of what will make this disease manageable... I must say, I haven't felt very good after these rides, but I have pushed it a bit both days distance-wise, and truth be told I haven't felt particularly good with or without the bike rides, so it's not really saying much. I feel good about having made myself get on the bike and go.

The Italian Job (2003): I liked this caper-flick, mostly because I like Edward Norton and Mini-Coopers. It was nicely paced and not generally too serious and self-important like some "actors" and movies I could name.

2510.1 / 1255

Short ride out the Rodota/West County trail, where I diverted onto a little double-track out into the mustard fields, which are blooming insanely right now. Nice little ride, nothing special, but it was good to get out and eat some bugs.

2502.9 m / 1238 d.

To Forestville and back, on the West County trail. Whew! Been a long time since I've done this one. It's really rather easy (though I tried to keep up the heart rate and the leg strength by staying in highest gear I could stand) and very scenic. Just a few mild inclines to make it interesting. Anyway, after two years dormant, my bike and I passed 2500 miles today. Got a new, very bright, taillight and got my under-seat bag installed properly, so I'm off to the races.

2486.2 / 1235 glorious smoke-free days.

Just a little jaunt, again, to keep my foot in the door, but a good workout, trying (and mostly succeeding) to maintain over 10 mph in gear 3-7.

2478.1 / 1234 days, dropping the mileage-from-last, as it should be relatively obvious that I rode 8.3 miles since the last ride.

Just a short out-and-back to get some pictures of oaks and mustard in the "golden" evening light: http://www.born-today.com/Vacations/2005/02/02-07.htm.

2469.8 / 12.6 / 1230

Okay, on a roll (sorta)! Second day, twice the miles. My legs were actually a little sore today - from a 5-mile ride! - so I was glad to get out and work it off.

It has been a week since I cut back on the sugar. This means quitting Coke (from a 24-to-60-oz-per-day habit), no longer adding sugar to coffee, and no chocolates, ice cream, or other sugary desserts. I still drink my Martinelli's and cran-raspberry juice (no ADDed sugar, but plenty 'nuff in the fruit juice itself, I reckon) and eat fruit and other stuff that contains natural amounts of sugar, so it's a fairly small sacrifice, but still significant I think. I was a little worried about diabetes, but the net result, after a week is simply a generally better feeling. Another part of it was... just be tired of supporting the big national brands (McDonald's, which I quit a few months ago after seeing "Super Size Me" and Coca-Cola), and maybe just trying to strip away some of the unnecessaries, now that smoking is a distant memory...

Anyway: good ride today - 12 and a half miles! A bit of chafing, but hey, it wouldn't be "Road Rash diaries" without some of that!

I hope to build at least a little bit of stamina for the late-March vacation in Mexico. We've signed up for ocean kayaking off Cabo San Lucas (!), so I want to be up to that and any other tasks. Tomorrow, I may even go to the gym (it has been more than two years). Would you be a little annoyed if your "health club" continued to collect $40/month for TWO YEARS without so much as a postcard to make sure you're okay? They're sorta the only game in town, and... I think... I let stuff like this get to me too often and I should learn to let it go. I could;ve quit the gym at any time, but kept the membership because (a) I don't want to give up on getting in shape and (b) I could afford it most of the time and it was worth it to me for (a).

Onward and upward!

2457.2 / ~5 / 1229 days smoke-free

Road Rash rides again! The bike has been gathering dust for most of two years. It is such a gorgeous day, I had to get out and ride. The back tire may have a leak, but at least held air long enough for this little ride. I want to work up to the 40-, 50-, 60-mile rides again, but let's pretend I never did those , and just get a couple of 5- and 10-milers for now. I note that sometime since the last time I looked, my rear light was broken off. Sigh. I will get a new one, one that takes the same rechargeable AA batteries I have for my camera.

~2385 / na / 366

Yep, we now have a year smoke-free. Two months drink-free. Unfortunately, also almost 11 months job-free.

~2370 / na / 335+

XXX: Triple Icks.

11 Months since the Habit That Dares Not Spark Its Flame. Now, more than one month since any alcohol.

2138.7 / 40.4 / 242

Eight months since the Habit That Dares Not Speak Its Name. Good 40-mile ride yesterday - longest ride yet, and as usual, perhaps a little more than I should've attempted.

AI (2001)

Been a while since I reviewed a movie here but, this one sucked so hard I think my VCR got a hickey. Here is a GREAT example of mindless spending on special effects in lieu of plot, characters, acting... William Hurt, who I generally respect as an actor, tries to keep his head down so his face is not associated with this pile of doodoo, but it's too late - we saw him. Jude Law sneaks in a pretty good performance as Gigolo Joe (in IMDB, Law is quoted as saying, "I would never know how to sell myself as a sex symbol. That's not how I'm programmed").

Haley Joel Osment shows a couple of moments of promise, and an hour of treacly make-it-go-away-ness that ensures his future in horror movies until he reaches adolesence and starts to look like John Elway, and then overdoses on a mixture of drugs and alcohol in a popular LA nightclub with Macaulay Culkin semi-implicated by calling for the ambulance.

Oh, but that's just one possible future.

Some rather expensive voices get no face-time in this movie...

Jack Angel (I) .... Teddy (voice)
Robin Williams .... Dr. Know (voice)
Ben Kingsley .... Specialist (voice)
Meryl Streep .... Blue Mecha (voice)
Chris Rock .... Comedian (voice)
Erik Bauersfeld .... Gardener (voice)

T notes that the most likable character in the story is Teddy, and it appears there's a good opening for a sequel. I rather hope Teddy can become a real bear and maul the other characters in that movie...

1779 / ~14 / 170

Annadel with Randy. Fun! The most "technical" riding I've yet done, mostly single-track, lots of rocks and roots (and mud, after the rain from the weekend! I was pretty much spattered all over with mud). I need some kind of toe-clips, or bigger pedals, for this kind of riding... I got left behind on the downhills, but not so much on the uphills.

~1765 / ~5 / 168

Did the West County Trail again Monday, and attempted to gear up (through a rainy week) to the new trail that goes from Big Rock to Loma Alta. I managed it yesterday, but not without a LOT of stops for air and water. I am a wimp still.

I realize that while I like riding on fire roads and stuff, I don't care to get very "technical." When the road gets a little steep I tend to inch my way down, unwilling to risk going over the handlebars or worse...

1746.6 / ~16 / 158

Checked out the West County Trail from here to Forestville and back. Pretty nice. There's about a mile stretch that doesn't have a paved bike path where you have to follow 116, but even that has a nice little single-track several yards away from the road. Then there are a few places where the bike path stops and restarts for short distances, but it's still really beats the hell out of the ride you'd have to do on 116. Now, if we can get the trail extended to the River and Armstrong Woods...!

On 2/15, I accomplished the stated goal of climbing the Burnside Road hill. The loop urned out to be closer to 20 miles than 17.

My current goal is to make the 17-mile loop that includes the full length (and height) of Burnside Road. I may try it today...

1700.5 / ~15 / 143

Road Rash somewhat ill, but still alive...

Lovely day out, and I managed the Pleasant Hill / Kennedy / Barnett Valley / Burnside / Watertrough route.

I was feeling really pretty down about still not having a job (though at least there have been jobs to apply for this week for which I felt I had at least a remote chance of getting an interview!). And now I'm relying on unemployment $$, having blown through a pretty big chunk of savings $$. And I just sit around here really not doing a whole lot - and not feeling there's a whole lot I *can* do. And the gym is starting to bore me, now that I took two weeks off to travel and have a cold, and I'm now questioning whether I really want "that kind" of muscle --- I REALLY just wanted to be slimmer, after all...

SO anyway, it's good that the weather's not crappy, and I can get out and do some significant miles.

Wore the bike shorts I got for xmas - modestly wearing sweats over them - and a sleeveless shirt to start on this year's tan (ha!). And the long climbs and drops on Barnett Valley and Burnside are good for the soul. Even though I'm *still* unemployed and *still* feel like a leaky money-boat in a vast ocean of non-opportunity, hey, it *is* a pretty world.

Rented and watched some old Burns and Allen shows last night - not as funny as Spike Jones, and George never *was* funny (the difference being that he was trying to be funny in later years), but Gracie had her moments, and was I suppose something of a pioneer as a woman comic...

While I'm not working, I mean to start drawing again - but of course as I worked out today, "All of art is in stARTing," and I haven't done more than buy supplies and think about it so far - there's still the blank page to contend with.

Ah well.

1670.6 / ~11 / 69

One of those days where I make myself get out and ride, and am eventually glad that I did it. The seasons here (and there ARE more than two) are very notceable if you simply get outside enough to notice. Not just walking from the house to the car, and not just going out hiking somewhere every few weeks, but really getting out consistently - to the same places if possible - so you see the subtle day-by-day changes: the difference after one, two, three rain storms. The biking helps with that, and more than the exercise value and the getting thin value and the challenge-and-self-esteem value, THAT is what I REALLY like about it.

Climb-first rides are sorta "more better" on these colder days - I get reasonably warmed up before flying downhill in the sharp breeze (today, 31.5 mph coasting down Watertrough Road).

1659.5 / ~14 / 66

Today's bike ride actually almost accidentally included the fearsome Burnside Road hill. Have been doing rides somewhat less than, but similar to, this one since being laid off 11/1. And working out at the gym most weekdays and some weekend days. Not that I'm "buff" or anything, or eve *want* to be - just tired of my flab, as noted below, and pleased with the progress I've managed from just a little of this working out'n'stuff. Have been absent from here because my profile on the QuitNet seemed to receive all of my journalizing for awhile, but now "the Q," like SO many other things, has annoyed me and I have left in ... well, not a HUFF, per se, but perhaps in a SNIT (cf Austin Lounge Lizards' "The Illusion Travels by Stock Car"). So perhaps I'll continue here now.

1600+ / 48

No more job. Still trying to decide if I resigned in the face of layoffs or was laid off outright.

At any rate, we're good for a few months of this before the situation becomes really desperate. I'm riding the bike about 10 miles/day. Also joined the gym and worked out there for the first time today. Really wanna be done with the "hate handles," as with the Addiction That Dare Not Speak Its Name, and this will help with both - and with general sense of well-being during these difficult times...

My new standard bike ride is nothin' to write home about - hence no blogging - but it is enough to keep me in reasonable bike-shape. Need, however, to exercise other parts of my body than my legs!

Holding at 1561 for now / 38

Rain. Good, long, hard, help-you-sleep rain, pattering all night outside the open window, making a nice clean smell inside. I actually slept thru my usual weird 1:30am wake-up. Woke briefly for the usual 3:30 non-event, but ultimately managed to sleep to 5 - latest I've slept in several days!

MUST join gym now. Sit-ups are helping the "abs," but dunno about "love handles" - I don't think there's an exercise that reduces those, other than overall sweating-out stuff. Be that as it may, weighed in today 11 lbs under my weight at the Dr about two months ago - so now a svelte and compact 214. More, I *feel* "muscular." Not Schwarzenegger-muscular, but maybe closer to Linda-Hamilton-muscular (which really is more my ideal anyway), like there's less fat and more muscle on me, like I have actual *strength*. MUST join gym to maintain this through the rainy season.

Have another book to edit. 88 pages. Should get me through today better than yesterday.

Halloween tomorrow: a night that at times carries for me a boatload of "triggers." I spent a few consecutive halloweens going to the exotic-erotic ball, which had already become something less than its original concept by then, but was still pretty fun insofar as it was one night I could dress up in drag and probably not get beaten up. Even at time looked pretty good, and might even have "passed," as they say. Six or seven years ago, went with a girl on whom I had an unrequited crush... Steve, in auburn wig, black lace teddy, leather mini, lime-green fishnets over purple tights, high-heeled ankle-high boots, with assorted chains and leather hanging on here and there - Pat Benatar meets Stephanie Powers. Or something. Wobbling along with a drink in one hand and a cig in the other, flirting with everything that moved and some that didn't.

You know, no regrets, but also no need to revisit. A period in my life that I look back at now with a mixture of "awe," "aw, shucks," and "awful." Be that as it may, H'ween can STILL (obviously) be a night for drinking and all that goes with it. One of those nights where you get the day off in advance NOT really because it's your birthday but because you know you're gonna wake up late, with a need to assess the damage! How nice, to sit home with a bowl of candy, half-hoping no kids show up so we can eat it all...

It's a strange and wonderful new life. I'm slowly getting used to it.

~1561 / 37

Pretty much a five-mile sprint (well, MY version of a sprint, slightly faster and sweatier than my normal speed) Friday to get to the bus. Slight chance of rain today - any excuse to avoid the usual bike ride! WILL join the gym this week.

Pretty good weekend. No biking, but nice hike on Saturday; pure laziness on Sunday.

The Addiction That Dare Not Speak Its Name, and Life, have thrown me a variety of curveballs (AND spitballs, AND sliders, AND...), but it seems like previous battles with TATDNSIN did prepare me somewhat more for this time, and I'm also going through a whole lot of other crap that seems, in a way, to strengthen my resolve. "That which doesn't kill you blah blah blah." Every single moment is an opportunity to succeed or fail, and trite as it seems, one moment at a time wins the hour/day/week/month.

Still, I often want to just curl up in a ball and hibernate through the next three or four months.

Sleep has been weird, of course. I seem to wake each nite at 1:30 and 3:30, before waking and getting up at 4:30 -- the earliest I can stand to allow myself to get up. On weekends, I then fade again at 12 or 12:30 in the afternoon and again around 6. This will pass, but it's freakin' annoying NOW.

Work should be picking up somewhat now. Being busy will help, I think. I dunno. Sometimes I question why I am doing this. I was on a somewhat pleasant path to oblivion with nothing standing in my way and here I have to go on this self-improvement kick -- for what?

Circular logic: I do it so I can continue to do it.

1556.5 / 34

Took the Pleasant Hill route, which may or may not become a Friday tradition. My hands are not working too well at the mo' - specially my right hand which almost never leaves the grip due to the fact that the rear brake is on that side.

After waking at 3:45a, waited as long as I could stand so I wouldn't be riding in the dark the entire trip, 30 sit-ups, too, besides crunches I (tried to) do last night while watching football (the least I can do, for all the effort the *players* put in, right?). I have "washboard abs" - if you count washboards that have been flattened by a steamroller and then dented into a convex shape...

Left at 6:15 or so, still dark AND (very) foggy, so I didn't see the sun 'till the last five miles.

On Bloomfield, a ghostly grey fox (or small coyote?!) crossed the road ahead of me - not as close as the "Masked Avenger" flying raccoon, but close enough to see in the pea soup and the dark.

I need fog lights! I had a cone'o'cloud directly ahead of me for the first ~10 miles, and had to constantly brake on the downhills (thus losing a lot of time and momentum) because I couldn't see the actual road surface ahead. When a car would pass, i could briefly see farther, but then dark again.

Have I mentioned the smell of apples on Pleasant Hill? Man, I don't even like apples that much, but it's like when you slice into a fresh crisp apple, that smell, as you pass (some of) the orchards... Really a treat!

By the time I hit Petaluma-Valley Ford, I am pretty much drenched from the fog. Didn't wear glasses, which bugs me because I like SOMEthing between my eyes and the occasional errant acorn, but at least I could see - which prevents errant ME from hitting a whole shitload of acorns!

Coming up Pepper Road, finally, rays of light shooting out of holes in the fog and between the trees, like in a religious painting - "holy cows" uncaring in the fields below - but it IS friggin' inspirational! Day 35, FIVE WEEKS, of a hard-fought battle, and what I'm doing right now is part of a direct benefit of my fighting of that battle. This is a big part of why I'm doing it, and a big part of why it's working. Circular logic.

To the showers!

~ 1532 / 33

For those who came late, the first number is the current odometer reading on my bike (mileage since about June 5, 2000), and the second number is the number of days since (huh, Norton Antivirus just opened a second instance and started scanning, sheesh!!) since we quit the Addiction That Dare Not Speak Its Name. Pleased to now be in day 35 of this.

To be fair, I manually started the first instance, and I must have it set to automatically scan at 7am.

Drove to work; still dark when I got here around 6:30. Starbucks' Venti Latte, the addiction that dares to speak...

Looking at a pretty much empty work day today, except for meetings.

Among other things that I've recently gotten from Amazon, the videos from Spike Jones' TV show! These just crack me up. By the time I got to Volume 4, some of the sight gags were old, but there were actual laugh-out-loud parts in every one of 'em. Don't know that they'll wear well, but they certainly got me out of Tuesday's funk. Maybe I should go ahead and get "The Spike Jones Story."

1527.8 / 32

Not gonna bother tracking the times anymore. Some miles are longer than others, and I have an optimum speed that I do (about 13, 14mph), and I'm comfortable. Great sunrise this a.m. Got a couple pictures, undoubtedly post somewhere later. Slightly different route, so minor it's not even worth describing, but it's nice to have one more option. Today the ride was very easy, other than starting out in the dark - I'd really rather not do that. Something not quite right with the overhaul - (new) chain slips a click every now and then, esp. in 3-8 (hardest gear), which is of course not good after sinking another $80 into maintenance I otherwise wouldn't notice.

I will cautiously say that the depression has lifted... Of all the things that might help combat this, Spike Jones and felafel (sp?) seemed to do it for me last night. But also, making myself find something positive, however miniscule and stupid, DID actually help patch up the holes through which large chunks of not-happy were coming.

1511.5 / 31 / na

Two rides off-road: Loma Alta again Sunday and Bolinas Ridge again Monday. Both rides kicked my ass; I went less distance than previous visits in both cases. Still, I suppose every horizontal mile and vertical foot does some good.

Huge ugly depression the past few days. Not gonna get into it here because talking about it tends to = dwelling on it, which tends to make it worse. Head down, shuffle forward...

The positives:

• A full month away from The Addictions Which Dare Not Speak Their Names, and no strong desire to restart either.


• In the same time, lost 7 or 8 pounds.


• Doing situps now when watching football; so sick of this beer belly.


• Haven't been watching football much.


• Money in the bank - a new experience for me.


• Not very hungry=lose yet more weight! Ate one small meal yesterday and almost puked THAT up.

Hey, you get your positives where you can! May think of more, but cling to these for now. When this thing first hit me, I figured it was just one of the dips one can expect when getting clear of a 30-year addiction. It has now gone on for more than three days, and I begin to think maybe I should get in and possibly move on to Thorazine, or at least adjust my existing anti-dep dosage. Spending a great deal of time on Quitnet, which seems to help marginally, if only to make me try to focus on the problems of others instead of my own.

But it pisses me off, because I feel I'm doing EVERYthing right - up through Friday, I felt really great - and yet am still running up the down escalator. Head down, shuffle forward.

1500.5 / 27.5 / na

Fair enough, took the bus home. Here's this morning's ride (the "Pleasant Hill" link).

1495.1 / 27 / 120+

Yes, that's at or over 25 miles this morning. That's how sick I am of 116, Roblar, and Stony Point. This 25-mile ride effectively avoided all three, at the cost of 9 more miles and a LOT of big and little hills. But also with the benefit of seeing:
- across the valley to Mt. St. Helena, tule fog clinging to the lowlands, orange sun just breaking the horizon (Pleasant Hill Rd)
- fog and sunlight mixed (Roblar after Canfield)
- An egret standing calmly next to a sheep (Walker Rd)
- wide shoulder or near-zero traffic, pretty much all the way
- Hawks and harriers and kestrels, oh my (all over)

Some of the time, riding my bike is like the times when I was younger, hitching... and I'd just be walking along an empty road someplace, waiting for a car to pass, not caring all that much if I did or didn't get a ride. My thoughts wander all over the place (and I thought I'd have a lot to write this morning), but if you stopped me and asked me what I was thinking during those 2+ hours I couldn't tell you. Hate to get all new-wavy-gravy (and what the f890 *is* up w/that, anyway, "wavy gravy," what a name to give yourself and live with for 40 years; what a maroon!), it's a lot like meditation, I suppose.

It *is* easier to do these explorations in the mornings. There is less wind, it's cooler, etc. I could *never* manage the reverse of this morning's route on one of those hot windy afternoons!

And so I close in on 1500, a LOT quicker than the first 500 or 1000...

(Yesterday evening) 1471.6? / 25.5 / 90+

Man, that wind just kills me. I feel like such a wimp when it slows me down, and I'm all whining and groaning up some hill. It wasn't windy out at like 2:00 and I was thinking I could try a different route where I'd avoid some of the annoying 116; then at 4 it's like 100mph straight in my face and all I want to do is be done with it. I should do my exploring of different routes in the morning, eastbound, when there's no wind or it's at my back.

Have thought for quite a while, seriously, that the more often I do this ride, especially that stretch of Roblar Rd., the more likely I will die or be seriously injured on my bike, most likely from an errant driver. I also need to "cross-train" if I want to be more all-around fit than just having huge leg muscles. I sorta hit a peak two weeks ago by doing 120 miles - I could do more, but for any permanent benefit at that level, I'd have to do it *every* week. And in spite of all this pedalling (about 350 miles in 25 days, avg 15/day, if you're keeping track), my belly is not getting noticeably smaller. And the rainy season will start any day. Plus, there are so few options on this ride, it will get boring. I also hate the fact that I have to commit to 90 minutes/16 miles or ~30 minutes/5 miles -- no in-between -- if I'm gonna ride at all. In a 90-minute span, the weather can change pretty drastically 'round here. Heh, supplemental to yesterday's lists, "Reasons Not to Ride At All"! So, guess I'll be checking out the gym soon.

Feel like, after almost 4 weeks clear of That Thing Which Dare Not Speak Its Name, it *is* getting a bit easier, and things *are* getting back to "normal." I'm able to concentrate somewhat more on my work. My two daily walks have become "necessary," but those two 15-minute breaks merely replace the 8-15 3-minute breaks I used to take in the course of the day.

1455.6 / 25 / 90

We Bad. It was actually just starting to get light in the east when I pulled up to work today.

Reasons to ride to work in the dark:

- less traffic
- lights make you more of a "sore thumb" than in daylight
- vehicle lights allow you to see them coming from behind
- cooler
- no sun in face, or faces of drivers coming up behind you
- can go home earlier

Reasons NOT to ride to work in the dark:

- fog makes it impossible to ride with eye protection
- can't see more than about 60-80 feet
- can't see gratings and other road-colored hazards till you're almost on top of 'em
- can't see around curves
- can't go over about 20mph (with visibility provided by current headlight)
- can't take eyes off road for a second
- tunnel-vision from not taking eyes off road
- dying raccoon flung, rolling, in front of you on the shoulder by passing car that hit it
- skunks and opossums running in front of you under their own power
- worry about lights running out of juice
- warmer
- Starbucks no less crowded

All in all, not really something I'd want to do all the time, but not too bad.

Frigid Bonehead's Diarrhea (2001): Not bad, really, I just like playing with the names (and hey, *they* used "diarrhea" to describe her M.O., not me!). Quite funny at times. Unfortunately, I'd expected it to be more "liberated" somehow - I mean, women I know talked about the book as if it was something new and different, and it's just this poor girl worrying about becoming a spinster and doing Mr. Wrong while waiting for Mr. Right - a plot as old as the hills, and not very P.C., either. Renee Zellweger is always charming with her funny half-shut eyes and tacky zebra-print underwear, but there's nothing earth-shaking here, just a light romantic comedy. "Whippy" plays himself, a Certifiably Annoying Twit. I'd probably have liked this more - or avoided it all together - if I hadn't been expecting more.

1439.9? / 24 / ~90

Pretty sure that was my mileage when I pulled in last night, but I thought did just the standard 16.4 mile ride...

Windier than usual, and the ride seemed longer, but actually it was about the same as usual. Finding that I can power up hills better - which stands to reason, I suppose, after the steeper hills of recent off-road rides. Roblar in particular is a stretch I never look forward to, but it really wasn't that bad once I'd done it. Thing is, I might start out in the highest gear, and then as the climb starts I reluctantly downshift one or two notches, and then the wind hits me full on and I'm a couple MORE notches down - it just kills all momentum, physical and mental. I do find now that I'm not quite as totally beat on that last stretch through Sebastopol and home.

A few bad moments with the Addiction Which Dare Not Speak Its Name, but nothing bad enough to make me start again. I get uncomfortable in my own skin, feeling very intensely that something is missing - and I take a walk, or eat or drink something, or whatever. I know the actual missing thing will not help. Even when I was using it regularly, one was never enough. Often required two or three in a row just to feel sated with it - for 15 or 20 minutes, anyway. What's missing was missing before I ever started THAT stupid thing, and that's what I'm dealing with now. I cannot stress enough how much the riding and walking has helped. I feel like I've made a complete 180 from self-destructive, apathetic, depressed to health-conscious, intensely emotional, and seeing a future. When I look at myself in the mirror, I don't honestly see any difference, but I see it in other people seeming to notice me, when previously I SO effectively managed to fade into the background that I did so pretty much all the time without even thinking about it, and generally thought of myself as invisible. Now I have a "presence" that is very new - I've actually had it before, in "manic" moments and when I was on anti-depressants before... So it's probably partly the Wellbutrin - but I think it's mostly the exercise. At the same time, as is well-known, I am generally more edgy than usual, affected more by things, more likely to be emotional and more willing to "get into it" when I am...

No ride today, though. Will take film in from Saturday's hike and do other car-required stuff. Brought in a fresh towel - nice, the "little" things! Tomorrow, a day-long meeting in that other city, but if I can get up early enough I'll ride in here and pool with someone else down there.

Man, last night's Cowbores and Deadskins football game was one of the dullest in MNF history, probably. Buddy and I slept through the fourth quarter.

DSL down this morning - I can count the times this happened with cable on one hand, but it's already happened several times with DSL - very disruptive to my routine of checking news, forwarding the daily cocktail, etc., and I have to head out (albeit early for a change) "empty-handed."

1422.9 / 23 / na

Started a page of links to our various hikes and bikes. On the way out today, saw the bus sitting there, and it was too good to pass up, so I rode it to SSU, biking the mere five miles to work from there.

There are some severely challenged people riding those busses, including those who are generally acknowledged as having "challenges," and those who have perhaps slipped through the institutional cracks, so to speak. I suppose I should be kind, and open-minded, and tolerant, but y'know, for the most part they *do* give me the willies, and I really hate having some guy grunting, moaning, and drooling in the seat right behind me, and not knowing what he's gonna do next. Meanwhile, he's "conversing" with another ward-of-the-state across the aisle, in a very repetitive, barely sensible conversation which focuses mainly on the fact that he has given the other fellow a red lighter and the other fellow can have a light now for his three (3) cigarettes, and he gets two checks, one at the workshop and one at home in the mail which the mailman brings, and he has given the other fellow a red lighter... And I'm thinking, if this is where smoking gets you, maybe I should quit or something.

Petaluma Hill Road is boring, with heavy traffic and a bit of a headwind, but has mostly wide shoulders and is blessedly short from SSU to Penngrove.

1417.6 / 22 / na

Biked most of yesterday's hike - not as hard as I thought it would be, and fun. Brought plenty of water this time, but was out in the sun for a much shorter period, so didn't need as much.

Did figure out that we probably would have had to turn back if we'd tried to do the loop. Also figured out, I think, that we didn't actually do "Drake's Head," which is on *top* of the bluff, whereas we went down one of the valleys. I didn't go all the way out to the "Head," figuring we'll do it together sometime.

1410.4 / 20.5 / ~100

What the hell, eh? Take the longest and worst route home, 14 miles up Stony Point to the bike path and 5 more miles on that. Stony Point just completely totally sucks, riding into the wind, with constant traffic. Plus it's like 90 degrees out. Still, MUST GET THOSE MILES, esp after being a pig all day with chocolate et al., fighting off the Craving Whose Name Will Not Be Mentioned, But Which Perhaps Has Lessened Somewhat, Lo, These Three Weeks.

I was getting bored with the standard route, especially that part of Roblar with the narrow shoulder. Now I appreciate it more again...

1410.4 / 20.5 / ~100

What the hell, eh? Take the longest and worst route home, 14 miles up Stony Point to the bike path and 5 more miles on that. Stony Point just completely totally sucks, riding into the wind, with constant traffic. Plus it's like 90 degrees out. Still, MUST GET THOSE MILES, esp after being a pig all day with chocolate et al., fighting off the Craving Whose Name Will Not Be Mentioned, But Which Perhaps Has Lessened Somewhat, Lo, These Three Weeks.

I was getting bored with the standard route, especially that part of Roblar with the narrow shoulder. Now I appreciate it more again...

1391.0 / 20 / na

Another uneventful ride, just getting here. 70 miles so far this week without actually trying for mileage.

Don't Say a Word (2001): "Don't Pay a Dime" to see this movie. Wait for it on TV, if you bother to see it at all.

Actually it started out pretty good, but then fell back on formula. Michael Douglas, who really runs hot and cold (but made $20M for "A Perfect Murder" and must've made at least 10 for this!), sucks pretty bad in this movie as a perpetually concerned father and wundershrink who has to get info from crazy girl Elizabeth Burrows (played very well by Brittany Murphy, who I'm surprised to find I've apparently seen in not-as-memorable roles). Douglas' "wife" (apparently mostly there for T&A value, yet never delivering T *or* A) and "daughter" (god-awful sickly-sweet, preciously-"bright" kid of whom I've already seen too much) are just plain annoying from start to finish, as is the "tough twenty-something female detective with a chip on her shoulder" who does exactly what you expect her to do scene by scene (is there just one person writing this crap-ola, or do they have to learn it when they enter the LA metro area - as if the state-line inspection stations checked not only for fruit, but for originality and ability to develop characters?). Oliver Platt, however, is -- as usual -- a bright spot.

Was thinking, wouldn't it be cool to have a Rules Wizard for real-life personal interaction just like in email, such that I could deflect everything Joe McCarty says into a convenient wastebasket, and put other people's stuff, by subject text, into convenient folders I could visit later?

Sigh.

1375.1 / 19 / na

No exercise today, but for my one-mile walk. Will ride to work tomorrow. Day 20 of freedom from the Addiction that Dare Not Speak Its Name. Supposedly, it gets easier...

Surfing Blogger all morning, recently-updated blogs. Amazing how many high school kids are on this - I suppose that shouldn't be amazing - where else but a free site? Lots of news-link sites. Ha, "that band Anthrax sure is getting a lot of publicity lately."

The irony of Rush Limbaugh's deafness is not escaping many, is it.

There's a point where you just want to throw up your hands and say "whatever." Everyone's got an opinion about this situation; everyone knows precisely what should be done in the Middle East. And I'm really tired of hearing opinions broadcast as fact. They may quote (or annoyingly, link to) hundreds of news sites to support their opinions, but you can find a news writer to back any opinion you like.

Editing this ... thing ... and it's SO poorly written, it's just sad. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, and much of it is learned behavior, but it is such a chore to edit this kind of stuff. Have already almost filled two sides of a page with "Global" edits, like:

replace "prior to" w/ "before."

replace "The xx page allows you to..." w/ "Use the xx page to..."

replace "The following table lists the items that appear on the xx page." w/ "The following items appear on the xx page."

replace "...transaction within <the product>" w/ "<product> transaction"

But I still hate to go past these things page by page (200+ pages) without marking them in some way to make sure they get fixed. I've had this thing on my desk for a week now - usually I have no trouble editing 200 pages in a day.

1375.1 / 18 / na

Bolinas Ridge *rocks*! Managed to get about five miles up the road before tiring and turning around. Then, pretty much five uninterrupted miles of pure downhill fun. Brought the camera; there'll be pictures later.

It's worth all the work of making myself ride to work, forcing myself to take that extra-long route or that extra-steep hill, to get to where I can do these off-road runs without too much pain. Big, big fun!

(Oh, oops, I'm sick today. <kaff, kaff!>)

~1365 / 17 / na

Rode home with Toby to watch MNF, and confirm earlier assessments that riding is a solitary pleasure. Most of the time, one or the other is a quarter-mile ahead. Very seldom can you ride side-by-side and talk. Toby tends to push harder uphill, and then go slower downhill, so that I'm straining to keep up on the uphill, and then losing all momentum hitting the brakes if I'm behind him on the downhill. I never stand up on the pedals to get up a hill - I'm not gonna kill myself trying to get up a hill; am content to be sitting down the whole time. I normally stop more often, drink water, enjoy the scenery a bit. It just wasn't pleasant. From last entry, yes, there are trade-offs, but I probably won't bother with this one again.

Red-tail on the wire along 116. Wonder if the hawks are coming back - still don't have a handle on their migration patterns, as some stay and some seem to go...

1349.1 / 16 / 93 min.

A little extra mileage, perhaps, over Orchard Station Rd - actually, even with the big hill, it seems like less (perhaps because of going quite fast on the other side). Though not 80mph.

I think I detect an ever-so-slight lessening of belly. Yesterday only ate McDonald's lunch and lean pocket dinner - probably still a zillion calories, but less than what I might usually do on a Sunday.

Weatherman so far says all clear all week. Toby riding with me after work, I think, to watch what is likely to be a virtually meaningless and unexciting football game (Rams vs. Lions). The more I think about it, the more I sorta regret inviting him. Much of bike riding, for me, is a solitary pleasure - much of tonight's ride, in fact, will by necessity be single-file, and then I have to match his speed. Be it faster or slower than MY speed, it's a pain in the ass either way. Oh well. You don't want to go thru life friendless, and sometimes there are trade-offs.

So, now I'm carrying another half-pound of crap, but am better prepared to keep it rolling.

Didn't try for any speed records today; it's really annoying how, even with my newly-buff legs, I get a lot of muscle pain starting out in the morning. Like my legs are going to resist getting in shape every step of the way. But once I get going, not too bad. I get *very* winded on a couple of the hills, but again, a relatively short stop at the top and I'm good to go onward.

Will NOT ride tomorrow. No I won't. I've earned a day off, I guess.

~1334 / 15 / na

Well, after 115 miles on the week, couldn't go through the weekend without at least a *short* ride today to keep the gains made so far.

While the beer gut still remains, I can feel almost no fat and a lot of "new" muscle on my legs. As if to prove it...

Loma Alta!

This was only about 5 miles round trip, but it was off-road, and - as you see at bottom - up some pretty significant climbs. Just when I was starting to think I don't really need that #1 gear on the front, I find a use for it. I actually only walked the bike twice, for about 50 feet each time. (At the point where I turned around, the road gets *really* steep, topping out at one of the highest peaks in Marin County.)

And the downhill reward! I'm still a little iffy on the reliability of the brakes in dirt, but did let go a few times for a some rather intense-but-pleasant momentum rolls... Fun!

Also got a quick lesson from "the bike guy" on repairing a flat on the road, so I won't get stuck again (unless I get two flats at once). From now on, I'll carry an extra tube and my new tire pump.

1327.1 / 13.5 / na

So, 115 miles on the week. I sure didn't get much work done.

1321.5 / 13 / ??

At precisely 1311.7, there on the wire beside Blank Road was a red-shouldered hawk, head feathers all fluffed up as if to say, "you can have a big head - you rode 100 miles this week!"

Mapped (links to large JPG) and profiled (links to small GIF) my new standard route this morning. The elevation seems less than I expected, but 460 feet is nothing to sneeze at, I suppose.

Right wrist a little sore - I try to remember not to rest my weight on the handlebars too much, but tend to do so anyway - at any rate, I overrode my goal this week by 10%, so likely won't be doing the full ride home tonight (and will end up with 115 miles from four days' riding).

It feels good, and the ride was relatively easy to do today. Though I took my time about it.

Early reports of 25-pound weight loss *might've* been exaggerated (but maybe not) - I actually feel lighter, even though I don't perceive any difference in the way I look - still have disgusting, too-large belly, and will need to do something other than biking to really have any effect on THAT.

T is also riding to work. Even though it's "only" a two-mile round trip, it *is* consistent exercise, and I applaud you, T, my faithful and only reader... <g>

Thus we leave road rash for this week (maybe I'll post that last five miles tonite, but...)

1305.1 / 12.5 / 85 mins.

Same route as the morning, and surprise! same time. Will pass 100 miles at about 1311.7, if I remember correctly - maybe I will treat myself to a bus ride home tomorrow.

Really kinda forced myself to make the whole trip this evening, in spite of significant weariness and possible rain, so that it wouldn't be a stretch to make 100 tomorrow. 100 miles is a *fucking* long ride on a bicycle, really, and it'll probably be a while before I attempt it in a 5-day week again.

Two different hawks, both red-tails, that I've seen now a few days running in the same places. They seem to be nonplussed by this wheeled being that passes beneath their wires/phone poles... Along the ride, cattle, sheep, llamas, and on yesterday's side-trip, emus... Not to mention the odd "sleeping" skunk/possum/raccoon in the road...

1288.7 / 12 days / 85 mins.

Slightly different route (actually, my standard homeward route, backwards), eliminates a couple of miles of hwy 116, at the cost of an additional hill or two.

Surprised that this was only 16.3 miles, actually, since the Hessel Road part I did this morning more or less "squares" the diagonal of 116... maybe I didn't get last night's mileage correct.

At any rate, have now done about 78 miles from Monday thru today. Probably will not do the whole ride home tonite, 5 miles to the bus stop is plenty'nuff.

Late yesterday, some wally scheduled a 9:15am meeting for today, so I sat theu an hour-long meeting with sweat cooling on me, and am just now getting around to getting ready to take a shower. There have been days when I was going to lunch by now...

1272.4 / 11.5 days / didn't time it.

It's windy even at 2 in the afternoon - maybe it's alway windy westbound.

As the mileage would indicate, I took another "shortcut" today, on a street that didn't have a "Not a Through Street" sign but deadended anyway. Added almost 3 miles to the trip home. But I wasn't in a big hurry, and now I know about Volkaart Road, so no big deal. Remembered that we pay monthly rent to live here; nothing going on at work anyway, so opted to get home and deal with the bank and realtor.

After today's 35 miles, no worries about hitting 100 by end of day Friday...

1253.9 / 11 days / 76 minutes garage to desk (let's start tracking this, too)

Foggy and misty. Glasses get all sparkly and pretty soon you can't see the road two feet ahead. Have to stop, try to wipe off glasses, proceed. On a longish downhill, you don't want to stop, so you push it a bit... finally, just pushed the glasses down on my nose so I could see with naked eyeballs.

Actually feels LESS dangerous, in the fog, than in the dark or daylight.

$80 later, bike is tuned up, with new tube and a new taillight that's significantly brighter than the old one. And I still have the old one - it fell off in the garage, and I though it had fallen off while the bike was on the rack on the car yesterday... So now we have an extra taillight, and $20 less than we would've had if we'd known the old taillight was still around...

Again had the pleasure of passing another cyclist - I'm NOT the slowest one in the world! I was stopped at the light at Mecham/Stony Point, he rode through just as the light changed. I stayed back for a while, thinking he was going to get up to speed and leave me behind, but he seemed to reach cruising speed while I was still only in 3-5 or so.

By the way, I never use the #1 front gear anymore, and actually only get out of #3 two or three times during the ride. The lowest I go is maybe 2-2, on the biggest hill (Blank road).

Weird how some times I feel quite healthy and "up," and others not - no decipherable reason. Even though it was less painful than it's been in a long time, starting out on the bike this morning, I feel really blah. Whereas on Monday, I was on top of the world, though it WAS quite painful pedalling those first few miles (not to mention the Blank Road hill). I don't know what governs this; wish I did so I could stay home in bed when it's not working to my advantage...

Have ridden 42 miles this week, including Monday's riding and walking - if I ride all the way home today, easily on track for 100 miles (barring further pneumatic "incidents").

"Zoolander" (2001) at the theatre last night. Good clean sillly stupid fun, and I think we needed a laugh like that. Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson really pretty funny as rival male models, and Milla Jovovich surprisingly not eastern-european-seeming as seemingly-American-imitating-eastern-european villainess Katinka. Stiller always cracks me up; he has absolutely the perfect mug for the kind of sad-sack comedy he does. As one Alternetter says, could be the next Austin Powers (though not as many catch-phrases; more like "catch-looks").

Have no idea what I'm doing here all day, but brought "Have a Nice Decade: the 70s Pop Culture box," which arrived in the mail yesterday. So, can listen to (some of) that...

1237.3, and 10 days.

Just when you start getting going...

Had thought to take a slightly-longer route, and sure enough, five miles out of town yesterday on Pepper Road, flat fucking tire. I count the four miles of walking the bike as legitimate mileage towards my vague, yet ever-nearer cycling goals. Will attempt today to get the tire fixed and get a tune-up, such that I can ride tomorrow, thursday, and friday. I need, at the least, a tire repair kit; at best, puncture-proof tires -- in fact, I'm just gonna go ahead and look into the GreenTyres. I have already spent, in a little over a year, almost the price of those tires in fixing and/or trying to avoid flats on this bike. The damned star-thistles are exverywhere, and when it's not those it's some stupid little nail or something. Without the liner, and the green goo, I'd probably be averaging one flat per month. Even with these preventive measures, it's about one every three months. One saving grace w/this bike, with the double-sidewall tires I can at least coast the downhills with a flat, keeping my weight as much as possible on the good tire, without damaging the tube (I think). Yeah, gonna get the greentyres.

Weird bigger-than-usual craving when I got in the car this morning - can expect to have these from time to time for the next 20 years, probably - you just hang on tight and it passes.

Stupid drivers who stay in the left lane through Sebastopol until the last minute, then cut in rudely when the lane ends - they KNOW the lane's gonna end; they get all of two or three vehicles ahead, and are still ultimately stuck behind SOMEone on the slow-moving 116, and so they end up with the people they cut off, still fuming, right behind them for ten miles. You risked an accident, possible injury, for this? You morons! Makes me grit my teeth, and I try to mellow out and forget about it, but there they are in front of me for ten miles, and when we get to the legitimate passing lane, there they are in the left lane passing oh so slowly... I must try to avoid this passive-aggressive behavior, though.

Overall, feel good. I feel like I AM losing weight, ounce by ounce, slow but sure, and in a healthy,. positive, way. Still don't know what I'll do when the rainy season starts, but will think of something.

1227.2, and 9 days.

Nothing major, and the ride is pretty routine now, even after a weekend of mostly inactivity. Snake parts everywhere. Red Tail on a telepost along Roblar didn't bother to move as I went by.

We did get about 5.5 miles in at the Coast Trail on Saturday. Last week's hike, as it turns out, was much longer and with much more total altitude gain/loss (see elevation profile at bottom) than originally estimated.

Warm this weekend and this morning. I didn't get started till well after sunrise - almost 8:00, actually - is way too easy to dawdle at the computer in the morning (and to be fair, I did update some of my Born Today index pages - timelines and alphas.

I'm thinking maybe I'll try to ride every day this week and get an honest 100 miles, but we'll see as the week wears on, eh? Today, might make the entire ride home instead of "wimping out" at the five-mile bus stop point. It's nice to get a lot of miles on Monday, and if I slack off later in the week I don't feel so bad. I'm SO sick of being like 25-30 lbs. overweight; I don't like myself this way, and it's something I think I can change with relative ease (non-drinking, actually, will probably take care of most of it), if I just apply myself to this regular exercise. Gotta come up with something, though, for the rain...

The addiction-which-dare-not-mention-its-name has not reared its ugly head *quite* as much over the weekend as during last week. I don't feel like the various bandaids are contributing that much (not as much as I've felt they contributed in past attempts [which didn't stick anyway...]), but I also feel it doesn't matter -- breaking down, giving in, fucking up, are simply not options this time. It feels SO good to be free of it, even partially free as we are now. This will work, and we will be clear of this hurdle for good. Still, have been grouchy as hell, and could literally end up killing someone if allowed to drive much.

Okay then; to the shower!

1200.0 precisely, and 6 days.

Am proud of the amount of riding I've done in the past few weeks - two hundred miles, most of it in the two weeks since 9/17. If I can keep this up, I may actually lose weight in the coming months. Hope the rainy season doesn't start too soon.

Not much of a ride today really, but had to take the car in for what never seems allowed to be simple & cheap. Tie-rod ends, allegedly, are worn down, and unfixable via lube = $175 (and wouldn't you know, Dave has just gotten a fresh supply of tie-rod ends! I think this is my last visit to Dave's - I always get the feeling they're laughing with glee as soon as I leave). And I still will need to get the front end aligned after that.

To jam or not to jam tonite? Since my music partner doesn't smoke or drink, it's probably okay. But since I had another weird semi-sleep last night, I probably won't be exactly rarin' to rock'n'roll.

Weird, conversations again with old "classmates." Some I look forward to, and hope to keep running; others I can take or leave - it's just as good to do the email equivalent of nodding as you pass, just acknowledging remembrance.

But contacting the Tholens - that's pretty special. Haven't seen any one of them for 30 years - and have looked. Jennifer is the only one I've "spoken" to so far, though she is trying to contact others. These people were my local "crowd" in formative years - age 6-13. Though formative, that's only 1/7th of my life to date, and it's a very old 7th. And trying to address Jenny in any meaningful fashion, having been absent from each other's lives for 30 years, me basically writing to the 12-yr-old I last saw (and reverting somewhat to the 13-yr-old I was when I last saw her) but knowing she has had an entire life - all the mistakes and correct moves one makes in that time: being sent to boarding school, three kids, husband died three years ago, having moved up & down the eastern seaboard, finding her natural parents, losing her adoptive parents, now selling real estate in MD... Trying to reconcile these two poles of *her* life to date. And I really want a friendship there, opportunity to give/receive something of value - this is the closest I'll get to any meaningful contact with my "roots" - so I'm walking a tightrope in some ways, making a new friend out of an old friend. She sent a picture yesterday - I hadn't asked for one - a great help in bringing it all into the present. Her middle daughter looks about like the Jenny I picture - Jenny herself looks completely different. Of course, I have web pages with a jillion pictures from all angles, of me, my wife, my cat, my life. She only logs on at work, so can't write much, so I tend to feel like I'm *pushing* to make things happen, and perhaps overwhelming her, because of course I can sit for hours writing (even at work, like now!), and I write "gushingly," almost at the speed of talking, where she isn't necessarily that kind of writer and may be nonplussed by this whole thing once the initial glow of remembrance wears. And maybe that's as it should be with these things, I don't know. (I guess this all begs the question; this *isn't* a gender thing, and there was never any sexual/relationship-type thing with Jenny; she was younger and sister-like through those years. I was taken in by this family, after schooldays, when nobody was home at my house till 5 or 6.)

I realize that I regret not having stayed in touch with Jimmy AND Jenny - and I realize I'll be going thru much the same stuff with Jim if and when I hear from him. Wonder if he still eats those awful "peanutbutter tunafish catsup and mayonnaise" sandwiches he used to like, now that he makes $100k/yr loaning money to corporations.

I suppose the glaze is already somewhat off the doughnut. I was really preoccupied with "what do I expect from this/what do they expect?" earlier. Now it's sort of settled and I'm accepting what happens.

I have always looked for them over the past 30 years, but had never thought much about what we'd have to say to each other when I found them!

Maybe THIS will cure me of that delving-into-the-past -- I can't think of anyone farther back.

BTW: MUCH more offensive to me than Maher - who does not pretend to be serious - is the "Buddy Lee" commercial on TV showing the stupid little mascot-doll with a bandage on its arm as if it has given blood. This strikes me as wildly inappropriate for a company attempting to make money from their television advertising.

Maher's individual comments did not carry the kind of crassly comercial subtext that a TV ad carries by its very nature.

1190.2 and 4 days.

Tried a different route this morning, actually hitting part of my old 3.5-mile route. Instead of going thru Cotati on Old Redwood Hwy, went down Stony Point to Jewett, over Center Road, to Rainsville and back to Stony Point. (That south end of Stony Point has a lot of traffic and almost no shoulder, so I avoid it.)

Sunny morning. I should leave earlier to avoid direct sun in my face (and in the faces of drivers who don't always notice they're sharing the road with me), but it's nice to have that crisp and clear weather. Still sweating like a pig when I finish my ride to work or home (or even the five miles to the bus stop) - thus Toby 's comments, which aren't at all meant to be mean, but "Hello, sweaty stinky old man" is NOT what I want to hear -- and though I sweat a lot, at this point there's not a lot of impurity in it, and honestly, I don't think I stink, not even of "sweat." When I put the shirt back on in the afternoon, it's a little stiff from salt but doesn't smell of anything. Doesn't bug me THAT much, but given my current state, he could get his head ripped off one day.

Unable to sleep normal hours lately - spending time awake from 11:30 or 12:00 to 2:00 or so, updating "Born Today" pages (never can resist a chance to plug it!), and then falling asleep on the futon with the TV on. Oh well; whatever it takes to get through the next few weeks/months/years...

Need to have discipline in my life; like to structure my days. Trying to ride the bike Mon/Wed/Fri is part of that, as it is part of trying to improve lung power, get in shape, maintain a sane weight, save wear&tear on the car, save gas, and expend personal energy.

Both local mom'n'pops have "failed" me in terms of daily latte service. Now I go to Starbuck's, and though almost everything about them annoys me, they can reliably make the same latte every time - even at 5am, if I should ever get in that early - without blasting their stupid family-values opinions at me.

Speaking of which, How 'bout the backlash to Bill Maher's comments! People are getting WAY too sensitive behind this thing. Don't people understand (rhetorical question) that the function of a good, not to say GREAT, comic - as of any good entertainer (and this includes "infotainers" like columnists and talking heads) - is to push the envelope, to push our buttons and see which produce a ringing sound? Especially a comic whose TV show is called "Politically Incorrect"!! Maher has always pushed those buttons. People desperately need to get a sense of humor. And a sense of perspective. Truth be told, he's right, to some extent: it does take a certain courage to fly an airliner directly into a building. These people were NOT cowards in that sense - they were highly-committed individuals, believers in their religion. (So sue me!) However, there are cowards behind them.

~1173.0.

Made it almost to the bus stop after work before plit. plit. plit, then plitplitplitplit and I'm getting soaked. Major thunder and lightning off to the west - cool when you don't get to see it much (and when there's like 20, 30 seconds between lightning and thunder so you know it's pretty far away).

Called T from the payphone with genuine downpour soaking everything in my wallet while I located her card.

Then, power goes out at the gas station, and for the traffic lights nearby, so everything gets really messy.

Still, got my 21 bike miles yesterday.

Raging raw nerves. Took a longish walk around the block, which helped - actually helped more than M&Ms or tic-tacs. Onward!

Supposed to be good weather for the rest of the week. Hope so; hope to get another 50 miles by friday evening!

1168.6.

Actually starting to feel the benefit (after feeling the detriment Saturday) of all this exercise, and not only got to work a *teeny* bit quicker, but was able to keep up a relatively strong pace through the entire 16 miles (except for the major hills) this morning. Also "sprinted" (for me anything over 20mph) the last mile or so to work. Toby, seeing me newly-arrived, said I looked "ruined." If I could somehow get it down to an hour - e.g. averaging 16mph - that would be pretty cool. As it is, I average between 11 and 12 mph, I guess...

Not much new seen on today's ride, but for dead deer and garbage bag along the shoulder of 116 that I saw from the car yesterday so was already watching to avoid. But the ride definitely felt more doable than it has (and more so than I had been imagining during my bike hiatus).

Saturday, 10-mile hike seemed to take out my right leg, but it was okay sunday and today - just a little muscle soreness (which one can generally expect after a 10-mile hike that includes at least 1000 ft of altitude changes, if one hasn't been doing such hikes regularly). Really, Lake Ranch and Ridge trails are very nice, and I'll do 'em again -- slower -- someday.

Not gonna talk right now about the item that is newly missing from my life (though just noticed I mentioned it earlier anyway, so...). Maybe later. Feeling it quite acutely, but will prevail this time, dammit. Underestimated, somewhat, the amount of habituality I've developed at work over a year and a half...

The bus-in-the-afternoon plan seems to work pretty well, though I'm still not sure what happens if the bus arrives with two bikes already on it. The stop is located such that I'm looking at 15 more miles if the bus is full. Well, there are always pay phones nearby, and hell, if I keep up the pace I've done the past two weeks, another 15 won't be a big deal.